San Francisco: Officer's house in the Presidio with "cool" people

tl;dr This house is beyond amazing, and we're "ok". We have coming available July 1st or sooner: you really have to see this place to believe it.

Hey you, glad you found this ad. My name is Larthur and I live at the house.
It's that time of year where beaver tails are thumping, birds be chirping, and people come and go. O great Fortuna! Our palatial abode is expanding! What luck you have! This is a really lovely place, and we're all really happy, so we hope you like it as much as we do.

Rooms still available:
The Sultan's Suite, Presidio King XL♔ room (about 15' x 20') - $2065

What to do next?
This place will go VERY quickly so please keep that in mind. Express your interest by sending an email! And we will follow up with the address. The email doesn't have to be crazy, you can read the "enhanced version of the ad" (down below), to learn what we're like. In terms of what we're looking for, just you! Be yourself!

The Presidio is a former military base turned national park. Located at the at the foot of the Golden Gate bridge in San Francisco, the Presidio is one of the few places you can live in the city, where it doesn't feel like you're living in the city. Imagine Beverly Hills country club meets redwood tree forests, all bordered by rocky cliffs crumbling into sandy beaches by the ocean.

The house has a lot of space and really beautiful commons. You have to see it to fully appreciate it but here's a preview.

3 stories + a huge basement
Two Garages
4 bathrooms - only one pictured. All are equally nice and there has never a shortage!
Living room - This room is the "mid-centch" room.
Kitchen - Ton of counter & cabinet Space, TWO fidges!! (Can you believe it?). Some of us cook every day, some of us not at all.
Dining room - lights by Dan Flavin forger, restored antique wood table, piano, more musical instruments than players.
Back Porch - We have two mid-century sofas that are perfect for chilling on and the weather is often great on the back porch.
Cinema - Seriously, we have an amazing movie theater. You wouldn't believe it...

Rooms available:

All of the rooms in the house are equally nice, seriously. The only real difference is price, for which you get space in exchange. Here's some extra info for your perusal.

The Squire's Boudoir (Medium sized)
Many squires' songs have been written for heroes of old in this inspirational space. Due to its excellent location, the squire's boudoir arguably receives the most light in the house. It also has an excellent closet, capable of holding all of your master's armor with room left still for a large trunk of ointments and other embrocations.
The Despot's Spire (M sized)
Way up amongst the highest tower of our castle, lies the DESPOT'S SPIRE!!! Here, situated on the 3rd floor of the house, you may contrive your ploys and plots, as you so love to do! Rest assured that you will have ample headspace to weigh the pros and cons of your political calculus, as the Despot's Spire is more secluded than the other rooms.
The Viceroy's Chamber (Large sized)
In this room, the viceroy can ponder the world, as you stroke your beard/ponytail. The is a large room available and you will find much wisdom to be found, as you gaze out your bay facing window from within this stately corner room. Or if you tire of the sea, you can train your eyes on our side yard, which is next to a highway (no, we don't mind. It's not that bad and it keeps the beasts at bay).
The Sultan's Suite (Persidio King XL sized)
In this room, masters of their domain may bask in the glow of peace and comfort of the large open space and numerous windows. This allows for effortless concentration for someone who needs to ponder the sublime and infinite. This furnished room has an office, dedicated seating/living area for entertaining your subjects, and a plush queen-sized bed as even the sultan has the humility to forgo what a king requires.

About us
Part of our current house is moving next door to start the new one. Currently, only three more rooms are available across both homes.

Larthur
I'm in my mid-twenties, a pretty chill dude, and I moved to SF about a year ago. I like the outdoors, playing music, sports, and, most of all, I like making things. I work a pretty regular schedule, about 9-5 M-F and when I'm at home I usually just relax and work on my little projects. Personally, I'm not super into partying at my house, but, ironically, I really enjoy throwing really good house parties.
Christy
Christy wants to meet you. She is from West Virginia but has lived in Sydney Australia before, mate! Give me a Foster's and we'll chill outback style.
Boden
full-time agent of Goldman Sachs, however secretly undercover to bring down the system. Builds drones while riding motorcycles, and has been occasionally known to breathe fire. Also likes to chill.
Sam
Sam is super cool and from Austin and builds tiny houses and you will like him, trust me.
Scott
Scotts Facebook information: Lives in San Francisco California, No relationship info to show, Ask for Scott's phone number, Ask for Scott's email, Ask for Scott's address, Ask for Scott's birthday, Ask for Scott's name pronunciation
Hoopie
That is her real name. She also works for Sam Adams.... so if you like free beer.

About you
Be yourself! It can be so uninviting when you read these ads and people are all like "You need to be in this field and have this gender and these interests and hang out all the time or keep to yourself and you can't use this room etc..." No. I hate that. What I care about is that you're open-minded and that's about it. I'm not trying to create the master race here. I'd much rather just let individual people's own personalities mix, and if an issue comes up, then we settle it. So part of being open-minded is being communicative too. Basically, I don't want to control the experience. Instead, I want to be like a gardener: let the experience grow, but keep an eye for any weeds (drama queens, emotional vampires, close-mindedness, etc...) Other than that, just be you :). Also, couples are welcome to apply :)

What's next?
At the time of writing this we have already filled two rooms before the add was posted so please act quickly if interested. It would be cool if you could write us an email telling us whatever you think is important so we can get to know you before we meet.